Friday 30 April 2010

Adventures in Motherhood - My Truths

A few weeks ago... or was that months ago... who knows... someone asked me to tell them the truth about childbirth and a few other things. She said that she always hears "it was the most beautiful thing... blah blah blah... lemme blast some more rainbows out my butt at you". Of course, I'm paraphrasing... anyway... she said that she KNEW I would tell her the truth...

Now, I have to admit that I'm not a normal case... first, I had to be induced at a hospital that does not offer epidurals and my pelvis proved to be too small for my baby's head. These two items alone are a recipe for a really bad day...

So to answer her first question... did it hurt? OH MY GOD, the best way to describe it was like putting my pelvic bone into a vise and having an uncontrollable urge to tighten the vise every few minutes. The decision to do the C-section came after I ended up standing up on the birthing table shaking in pain.

How was it to come home... this was really hard. I can remember walking into the house, holding the baby and thinking "Now what?". We had the baby room all set up, the bassinett in our bedroom but nothing in the downstairs of the house to put the baby in or on... we hadn't thought about that part. I spent the good part of the first 6 weeks holding Connor. I ended up with a really sore arm for quite awhile.

Her final question was "What advice would I give..."

Have things to put the baby in... playpens, bassinets, swings, bouncy chairs, excerisers, play mats... they seem to cost a lot of money but they are worth their weight in saniety.

Read the sections about C-sections... even if you don't plan on having one... read it anyway... you never know what will happen. Honestly, I was relieved when the conversation turned to the C-section in the delivery room.

As crappy as it is to keep the I.V. in after the baby is born, it is a source of morphine. Keep it to the bitter end!!

And the most important piece of knowledge...

No matter how hard you try, you cannot O.D. on nitrious oxide... once I figured that out, my day greatly improved!!

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That's why they call it "Laughing Gas! lol

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